"This man is insatiable, or maybe all men are like him. I have no idea, no one to compare him to."
Me: This book has to be a satire.
Daphne: If it's a satire, no one gets the joke.
THIS REVIEW CONTAINS SPOILERS (but honestly, who cares)
When I considered writing a sequel to my Twilight review, there was really only one option: Fifty Shades of Grey. Fifty Shades notoriously originated from a Twilight-inspired fanfiction and has since blossomed into a trilogy of books and a multi-million dollar movie franchise. Since 2011, middle-aged women worldwide have swooned over the erotic romance of Christian Grey and Anastasia ‘Ana’ Steele – yet at the same time, it is also one of the most widely mocked, criticised, and parodied pieces of fiction in history. As well as thinking it would be funny to read and review this novel, I was also curious as to how this dichotomy of public opinion was formed. How is Fifty Shades of Grey so popular, and yet so universally despised? I attempted to find out.
Never before have I encountered a published author with such an astonishing lack of talent. The prose in this novel has no originality or flair, but it is loaded with clichés and stereotypes. The sentence structure is clumsy and awkward, ‘big’ words are selected out of the thesaurus at random to boost the intellectual value of the text and are repeated over and over again, and there is no grasp of realism whatsoever – Anastasia, bless her stupid heart, somehow managed to graduate university without being required to create an email address. The characters mutter, murmur, and whisper almost everything they say, even when it makes no sense. Ana’s best friend, Katherine ‘Kate’ Kavanagh, is referred to by her full name every other time she is mentioned. And lord, do not get me started on Ana’s ‘subconscious’ and ‘inner goddess’. These characters – yes, characters plural, because EL James made the inexplicable decision to personify Ana’s subconscious and feature it in two recurring roles – appear as an angel and a devil on our protagonist’s shoulders, her subconscious homely, cruel, and scolding, her inner goddess a kinky horndog who melts at the mere mention of Christian’s name. This might have been funny if mentioned only once or twice, but Ana’s guardian angels appear over 75 times throughout the novel – and I only started counting around page 50. It’s official: Fifty Shades of Grey is literally the worst book I have ever read in my life.
Part of what makes Fifty Shades so intriguing is the BDSM relationship between Ana and Christian. For those without an internet connection, BDSM is a kind of erotic, consensual roleplay between sexual partners that usually involves one person taking on a dominant role, and the other taking on a submissive one (in Fifty Shades, Christian is a practised dominant and Ana becomes his reluctant submissive). What we see in Fifty Shades of Grey is not BDSM. Christian, we learn, was molested as a teenager; at fifteen years old, he was propositioned by an adult woman to become her submissive. As an adult, in order to regain the control he relinquished as a teenager, Christian uses his money, charm, and dashing good looks to coerce hapless women into becoming his own submissives. On page 436, Ana has the ‘realisation’ that BDSM is “his way of showing that he cares. Perhaps the only way he can show that”. Yet this does not excuse Christian’s behaviour; it highlights the psychological damage he has undergone and the professional help he needs to seek. Perhaps if the story was about Christian realising that his behaviour was a product of his trauma, the book would have had some merit, but this is not the case. It is about an abused man taking out his issues with women on other women.
And the worst part? Anastasia knows this. She calls Christian a control freak and a stalker regularly. She often notes that she is not only intimidated by him, but afraid of him. On page 345, she tells the reader, “I know I’m meant to say yes, but I don’t trust him”. The thing that makes this relationship even more alarming is the fact that Ana has no self-esteem. She is terrified of Christian, yet she is willing to do whatever he asks of her because she believes it is the only way to be with him, and she doesn’t want to lose his devotion. She admits it on page 472:
This is why I am so reticent about our relationship – because on some
basic, fundamental level, I recognize within me a deep-seated compulsion
to be loved and cherished.
She has never had a boyfriend before, is a virgin when she meets Christian, has no one to compare him to and no idea how a regular romantic relationship is supposed to function, let alone a BDSM partnership. Christian takes complete advantage of this. Ana is afraid to be without his attention, and thus he knows that he can get away with anything he wants.
Despite the well-deserved ridicule it receives online, Fifty Shades of Grey had sold 125 million copies by 2015 (Wikipedia). Christian and Ana’s relationship has eclipsed Romeo and Juliet as the couple people call ‘relationship goals’ without knowing how fucked up the relationship really is. How did it become so popular? My guess is that the women who read this book feel like they can relate to Anastasia. Because that’s what sells books, right? Relatability. Feeling like you can connect with the characters. What worries me about this connection is how the book preys on the insecurities of women through the depiction of an insecure character like Anastasia. This books thinks it is about a compelling romance, but in reality, it is about a young woman who falls for the third and richest man who gives her attention. (Two other men displayed romantic interest in Ana before Christian – although how or why is unclear, since Ana has literally no personality and thinks listening to Snow Patrol and Kings of Leon makes her music taste “indie”.) That man manipulates her, stalks her, coerces her, threatens her, beats her – but, on the odd occasion, he worships her, and it is these tiny moments of perceived adoration to which Anastasia clings. Her absence of self-esteem and self-worth is filled by Christian’s attentiveness, his extravagant gifts, his possessiveness, and his need for her, and even though he mistreats her beyond belief, she still falls madly in love with him. This is not a healthy relationship. But it is marketed as one, and it is interpreted as one by millions of women across the world, and that it what takes this book from ludicrous to dangerous.
WORKS CITED:
WEBSITES
- Penny, Beth. “Fifty Shades of Grey: It Doesn't Take a Genius to Realise That Christian Grey Is a Domestic Abuser.” The Independent, Independent Digital News and Media, 13 Feb. 2015, https://ind.pn/2rjUhZE.
- Purcell, Carey. “Fifty Shades of Feminism - A Response to E. L. James' 'Fifty Shades of Grey'.” The Huffington Post, The Huffington Post, 4 Mar. 2013, https://bit.ly/2HM8sS9.
- Unknown author. “Domination, Submission, and Consent: Inside the Kinky World of BDSM.” The Daily Dot, The Daily Dot, 19 Apr. 2018, https://bit.ly/2jrz0K3.
WIKIPEDIA ARTICLES
- “BDSM.” Wikipedia: The Free Encyclopedia. Wikimedia Foundation, Inc. 26 April 2018. Web. 23 April 2018.
- “Fifty Shades of Grey.” Wikipedia: The Free Encyclopedia. Wikimedia Foundation, Inc. 3 May 2018. Web. 4 May 2018.
